I’ve not written much lately. This is partly for a number of reasons. Firstly, I want to slow down my input with regards to this blog. Secondly, I’ve been away and finally I just feel so tired all of the time.
In fact, it has become such a major part of my daily living I’m wondering if I can include it on my CV as an occupation or a hobby. When tiredness hits it’s all I can think about. Nothing can get me to focus on anything else. I become tired and that is who I am, a man who is tired and needs sleep.
No crazy routines
I’m not following any crazy schedules or working late shifts anymore. I’m making a conscious effort to eat better. But I now find I could fall asleep should the opportunity arise. I wake at a normal hour of the morning then find myself dropping off to sleep again after a short while.
I am aware that coffee and sweet foods can have an impact upon my sleeping patterns. However, I have now cut out sugar from my drinks and I have reduced my coffee intake to about two cups a day.
Of course, you are aware that I have recently come out of a stressful situation but there are other stresses still going on (that I will talk about another time). But nothing much has changed. I do feel better about myself but this is undoubtedly due to the medication and the coming to the end of my counselling.
I recently had a blood test for something unrelated and nothing was highlighted. I’ve had no change in my medication. So, what on earth is going on?
Is there a connection?
I spoke to a medical friend about this and she drew an interesting comparison. She suggested that the psychological stresses that I had experienced – including the acquittal at court, may now be having a physical output. I am aware that I have been very near to breaking point and only kept it together because of support. But my physical health has clearly been side-lined.
I’m getting more than the minimum requirements of sleep. I find that I’m getting between 8-10 hours a night then at least a few hours during the day.
Recently, I have suffered with back pains and the odd leg cramps. My belly has returned and my skin does not look as clear as it used to. So a lot of what was said makes sense. But I don’t know what to do about it. I’ve had time away and I’m getting back into reading again (of which I have always enjoyed).
Simple on-line research
Following some simple research, I discovered that physical tiredness also brings about the following:
Feeling drained mentally and physically – Literally everything involves an effort. As stated I could drop off to sleep whenever I get the opportunity.
Inability to bounce back – This has been the case for a while now. I have previously written that I have no emotions whatsoever. This has still not changed. I’m not saying I am emotionally void, it’s just that I see a little more perspective on things and so don’t get so involved in things anymore.
Headaches – These come and go but nothing blindingly bad.
Joint pain – I have had horrendous back pain for nearly a week now. I have no idea what has caused it but it has been slow to disappear.
Depression – Goes without saying.
Poor short-term memory – I often have difficulty recalling what I had to eat yesterday but I could tell you in great detail events that happened years ago.
Weight gain – My belly has come back. I worked hard to lose it a while ago but there it is, it’s back.
Now, I know I’m not being a hypochondriac and hope that this will just go away, but following recent events I don’t want to see my GP again. I’m sure she must be fed up of me by now.