I awoke this morning recalling a moment many years ago that happened when I was at school. Yes, it was just a moment but it has lived with me ever since. Even now the thought of it ‘boils my piss’, but this behaviour is allowed to persist, and in some quarters, it is actively encouraged.
I utterly hate and despise injustice.
The moment I mentioned happened when I was 15 or 16. There was a specific teacher who (for some reason) did not like me. He never taught me anything but he always aimed for me in the corridors or the playground. He was a vile little Welsh man who clearly had some issue with his height (nearly every child in year 7 was taller than him and he clearly hated it). And so with the excessive weight (for a little man) he tried to throw it around as much as he could.
Anyway, one morning he targeted me whilst entering the assembly hall. He shouted right across the hall for me to get out. Well I didn’t have a problem with this because I really didn’t want to endure his pointless dialogue anyway. So I stood outside the heads office whilst he preached some kind of shit to the rest of the poor unfortunates left in the hall.
Once he had finished in the hall and the school had been dismissed his little chubby legs made their way towards me. He accused me of doing something that I had not done and without listening to my protestations he issued a detention. In the scheme of things getting a detention was no major issue but it was the fact that he had refused to listen to me before issuing his injustice. He was wrong and he knew it but he clearly got off on pissing me off. In fact this little prick enjoyed pissing nearly everyone off. He was a bully who would never have survived in the real world of work outside of a school because I’m sure someone would have flattened him otherwise.
Little man syndrome
Many years later after leaving school I bumped into this excuse for a little man whilst he was out with his family. The shit had the audacity to approach me with a smile on his face and say “hey, how are you doing, it’s good to see you”. Well it must have shown in my face because I knew I was filling up with rage. I had the greatest pleasure in telling this little man (in front of his family) how vile he had been to me whilst at school and how dare he approach me in such a manner. I finished the conversation with “now f$ck off”. It was a great feeling. There was nothing he could do about it. Although even now at the age of 45 I still don’t feel the injustice had been addressed.
So how does this relate to today?
Well it appears that those of whom persist in creating an injustice are encouraged and certainly don’t offer any form of retribution for their actions. Therefore, injustice is allowed to grow and flower. It strangles the decent folk who are left behind to lick their wounds.
I have made it clear throughout my blogs how much I have been disillusioned by the English justice system. But it doesn’t end there. The whole system supports liars and bullies.
You’re a liar but that’s ok
Let me explain this more. Whilst in court I proved that my abusive ex is a liar. Her own words and that of her daughter contradicted each other. Her evidence was proven to be false. Even her statements were riddled with contradictions and her own lawyer told her to think carefully whilst she spoke in the dock.
It was nice to have the opportunity to be heard after months of remaining silent. At no point had I been afforded the decency and respect to put my story across. One person had made an accusation and therefore, it must have been true. What utter rubbish. I considered that guilt needed to be proven before guilt was established. But no. This is a fallacy. And beyond the rhetoric the opposite is allowed to remain.
Being gagged is being enforced by the law
I was angry that my innocents was not allowed to be heard. The longer the enforced silence was imposed the more I want to shout out. I was innocent, in fact I had been the victim but I was anxious because I was not (and still not) allowed to speak out and be heard.
Once the trial had been concluded I spoke to my solicitor about the evidence that had been put forward. The facts that I had been assaulted and the fact that she had been proven to be a liar. Evidence had been provided to show that she had a track record of false allegations against other men. In fact so much evidence had been provided that it transpired her younger daughter had moved in with her father because she couldn’t live with her mother anymore.
I was told to drop it. To leave it be and let it become an ‘experience’. But this is wrong. This injustice was allowed to go unpunished. Her poor behaviour was/is not allowed to be addressed. Her law breaking is, in effect allowed to actively continue without fear of punishment and retribution.
I had, whilst living with her and after leaving, being living an utter hell. In so many ways I had lost what is sacred to everyone, I had lost my identity. I had further lost my dignity and potential freedom. The system allowed my ex to throw her weight around without any fear of retribution or punishment. She knew how the system worked against the disadvantaged and she played it to its full effect.
Real crimes are never actually punished
The injustice arises that any wrong doing such as abusing, assaulting and making false allegations is unpunishable for certain sections of society. She made the allegation first and so was protected by the law. I was proven to be the victim yet I am not afforded the respectability of an apology or reckoning.
I suppose the only solace I have is that the truth finally came out and she was exposed in a small room for being what she is. But what about her next victim? Will she continue until she gets what she wants to the cost of another innocent person?
I know I will never get an apology from the authorities because they are full of little men with big egos. They are protected by their own untouchability and will never lower themselves to apologise to a little individual in a sea of faces. They don’t feel they have to and so wont.
The law really is an arse
Here lies the injustice. The law is not blind and fair. Yes the truth may come out but punishments are not given out to those of whom deserve it.
How many times have I read about women who make false allegations of rape. Their punishments are never equal to those of whom had been wrongly accused. And so yes, a victim will always remain the victim as the system is too lazy to address these imbalances.
Individuals should never be considered as little people. When cut we bleed and when we have been wronged we continue to bleed in so many different ways. We have been victims in an abusive relationship and our victimisation is perpetuated by social services, the police, the courts and in some cases by our own employers.
Fiction is greater than facts
Everyone is supposedly innocent until proven guilty. This theory does not stand up to scrutiny. It is so much easier to point a finger at an innocent person than to admit the whole system is wrong. And why is this? It’s because your existence is meaningless to people with power.
I know of someone who took his life because of a false allegation. Following investigations by a coroner nothing was changed. It was easier to allow the status quo to remain than to get people of authority to answer for their actions.
I now realise that the vile teacher I had many years ago hold all of the cards because people fear a false authority. People would rather believe lies because it is often more sensational than the truth. But victims will remain victims because no-one is prepared to hear the truth.