I don’t easily get cross or angry. I would like to think that this a good characteristic about myself. I pride myself on being able to see events and actions from both sides. However, I’ve just had some news that firstly doesn’t come a surprise but secondly has proved my point precisely.
Follow on from complaint
If you recall following my acquittal I raised a number of complaints to various establishments. One of these complaints was to the police raising my concerns about unfair treatment and their heavy handedness and blinkered views when it came to male victims of domestic abuse.
A short time after my formal complaint, I was invited by the police to attend their station and put my account across about what had happened to me. Following the interview I felt comfortable (if not elated) that for once I was being listened to.
During the interview I provided evidence based on statements, texts and emails I had received from my ex, independent diary accounts when I had reported the assaults I had endured.
My statement totalled about eight or nine pages and I was happy to sign each page confirming that what I said was true, accurate and I was willing to attend court to state the facts. The police officer taking the statement stated that she was satisfied that there would be enough to prosecute.
She needed to stop
I must admit I was slightly reluctant to go ahead with this because I know the pain of being arrested and questioned under caution. Yet I knew I was telling the truth. Furthermore, as you may recall, she had a history of such actions and saw it as her right to create problems for men when she felt the relationship was over.
She had her previous exs arrested and charged for the same things as I and on each occasion the cases were thrown out at court. Therefore, with this history I felt it was justified to go ahead and push for a prosecution.
How much stupidity does one department need to have?
Today I received a phone call from the police to say that after consideration they were not going to follow the case up any further. It is fair to say I was livid. I stated that I had given them hard and irrefutable evidence that included statements from other people and professional agencies.
I also informed the police officer that the police were all over me like a ‘tramp on chips’ following a fake 999 call and no evidence at all.
This police officer was not only dismissive but clearly ignorant of the facts as I put them and the evidence that proved I was right.
There is literally nothing more they needed apart from a knife in my back
But lets consider this further for a moment. Let’s look at the facts as they now appear.
Firstly, I had reported my assaults to my work organisation that kept dates and comprehensive details about the assaults and threats I had received.
Secondly, I had kept text and emails from my ex highlighting what kind of assaults she was prepared to carry out.
And finally, I had independent witness statements from people who knew me and was aware of what I was enduring. Furthermore, one of the witnesses also knew my ex and what she was like. Each statement supported my view and accounts.
And so men will remain silent
But here is the ‘rub’ which I now consider as fact. The final response from the police now indicates and proves why men don’t bother reporting abuse to the police. I opened up about events and actions that no-one should ever endure in a relationship. I stated facts that were uncomfortable and I had each statement tests for validity. Yet they ultimately failed to do anything.
It now appears evident that the police are blinkered and biased when it comes to domestic abuse. They failed me and have no continued to do so.
I will stress now, if you are a male in an abusive relationship and you manage to get out (or for that matter have to remain in the family home) don’t bother calling the police. All you will do is create un-needed stress and upset. You will be left bereft at the level of ignorance and unreasonableness by the police. Let me remind you, this happens in a democratic society and abuse is going on in so many places.
Unfortunately, we men have no protection under the law to combat domestic abuse.
It’s not over until the fat ‘paper’ sings
But not to worry the national press now have access to my story (and my phone number).